It's My Life by Melody Carlson

Author:Melody Carlson
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: Young Adult
ISBN: 9780307564849
Publisher: Multnomah Fiction
Published: 2001-01-01T10:00:00+00:00

Wednesday, September 19 (accusations)

I'm not going to apologize for not writing in my diary every day. I'm just not going to do it. I'm tired of apologizing, and besides I've been pretty busy lately and life's been fun. Jenny and I are having a great time being seniors; we just do whatever we want, hang with whomever we want, and we don't worry about what anyone thinks. It's great! And we do try to include Beanie, really we do! And occasionally she actually joins in, but usually she doesn't. I'm not even sure why, but I think she may be jealous of Jenny. Still, I do lots of stuff with Beanie (I certainly have NOT dumped her), but I figure there's room in my life for more than just one friend. (Although I do consider Beanie to be my best friend and have told her as much, but I doubt she completely believes me.) And I still consider Andrea to be a good friend too, but since she goes to another school, it's more natural not to hang together so much. What's wrong with having a variety of friends anyway?

But that's not how Beanie sees it. And I guess it should come as no surprise when she calls me up tonight and says some pretty mean things. At least I think they're mean. She says she's just trying (in her words) to speak the truth in love. So she proceeds to tell me how she went to church tonight and Pastor Tony was preaching on this very subject, and now she feels like she's supposed to come home, call me up, and tell me all about it. “Thanks anyway,” I tell her, “but if I'd wanted to hear Tony's sermon, I would've gone to church myself.”

Well, talk about opening a can of worms. She then feels it's her Christian responsibility to tell me that she's “worried about my spiritual condition.” Those were her words! And I'm wondering, who is she to worry about my condition? I mean, this is the girl who got herself pregnant last year, was nearly suicidal, and pretty much a great, big mess. But do I mention these uncomfortable subjects? No way! But as a result, Beanie just launches into this little sermonette about how she used to look up to me in spiritual things, but now she thinks I'm just throwing everything away in order to be Jenny Lambert's best friend.

“I am not Jenny's best friend!” I shoot back at her. “We're just good friends. And besides, I thought you and I were trying to reach out to people at Harrison–”

“Have you told her about Jesus, Caitlin?”

I resent the question and don't even want to answer, but I give it a try. “You know there's more than one way to share something with someone,” I begin, feeling a little hopeless. “Maybe I want to build a friendship with her first, and then I can share later.”

“Well, that's perfectly fine, Caitlin, but I'm just wondering who's

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